Boys are gross, Part Deux

Why does Parker suddenly want to pee standing up? I’m a girl, I don’t understand the trajectory of the three-year-old penis. And I'm not sure he's ever actually seen it done (Where's Greg when I need him?). We now have pee all over the bathroom, back of the toilet and his pants.

In the meantime, Dillon was sitting at the table finishing his dinner. He used the corn on the cob and chicken nuggets to scoop up the mashed potatoes. It took two wipes to clean-up his hands and face. And his shirt is still a mess.

Oh well, looks like an early bath tonight.

Boys are gross

Case in point: Today Parker picked up a long blue fingernail at the park and said, “Look at this, Mom.” Yesterday it was a used Band-Aid.

In the car on the way home, Dillon says, “Mommy, I got a gooby (aka bugger).” I handed him a tissue to get it off his finger and off we went.

I’m grossed out on a daily basis. I was so hopeful when Parker refused to eat certain things because it would make him “all dirty.” That phase has past, and quite quickly, I might add. Oh well, off to clean-up yet another mess.

Is the word playdate in the dictionary?

I never thought I’d use the word playdate. What kind of word is that? Is it even a word? Two words? Anyway, I thought it was a word only minivan driving soccer moms use and here I am using it.

In fact, I kind of live for playdates. Any excuse to have an adult conversation and have someone (besides me) entertain my boys.

So, if you’re looking to have a (gasp) playdate, you know who to call.

What is the age limit on when you can’t wear new shoes home from the store?

I LOVE new shoes and bought the cutest pair of yellow wedge sandals the other day. I haven’t gotten to wear them yet. What’s up with that?

Hello, Colorado. Let a girl wear her new shoes already. Weather, please cooperate. Please….

Desperate Mom Tip #215

NEVER let your already weak stomached kid ride the merry-go-round thing at the park for more than 10 minutes.

Parker was loving the big kids pushing them around and stayed on that thing for ever. After a while he was just laying there, should have been my first hint. Then he told me he wanted to go home - hint number two. Quiet all (most) of the way home - hint number three. And about three miles from home - bleh.

Vomit all over the back seat of my car. It took me 30 minutes to take out Parker's seat, Dillon's seat (so I could get the seat protector off) and figure out how to take the carseat cover off.

Let's just say, next time we go to the "Taco Bell Park" (so named because it's near Taco Bell), we will focus our time on the slides.

Opening doors to new adventures

I was so happy when Dillon could finally open a door (about four days ago). Finally, I don't have to get out of bed to get him in the morning. No more, "Mommy. Where are you?" Small problem, now he can open the door.

I put him back to bed three times already tonight.

Remember when St. Patty's Day meant a day of partying?

Ah green beer. Are you a figment of my imagination? It's been so long.

Amazing how much your life changes when you have kids. You might be able to sneak away for a beer or two, but there's no way you're gonna get to CB Hannigans by noon. Today it's even worse. With a house full of sick kids (and husband), I'm not going to even get my lips wet.

Enjoy the day my friends. Have a green beer for me. But don't worry, I'll be wearing a green shirt today.